Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Strange Days Ahead

Strange days indeed. On the first leg of a long week and a half of travel for the Bearden Wonder - and as such, taking my maiden voyage on American Airlines GoGo in-flight wifi. I'll have more on this below, but here's the kick in the Houston Nutt - it's $14. Still waiting for that lap dance that should come with it....

But I digress - because I'll be traveling all over this great Country for the coming 8 days, who knows when I'll have a chance to speak with you, my mindless sports talk brethren so thought I'd sneak away from work for a bit to get some things off my chest.

Reactions, Observations, Insights and Retractions from the weekend of all things football...
  • Before I dump poop on the Texas offense (and I'll do it), let me just say this - the defense is ridiculous and I don't want to lose a moment to remind Texas fans of what transpired on Saturday night on the Texas plains....the Longhorns held Texas Tech to 144 yards....TOTAL for the game. I'm not sure when the last time Tech was held to this low of an offensive output, but it was a loooooong time ago. Go back and read that last statement - 144 total yards. Unbelievable. This defense is scary good.
  • But wait, there's more....Alan "Funky-Ass Baseline" Vassberg reminded me of an even more eye-popping nugget in that stat - Tech had 14 offensive possessions/drives. Two of them produced 133 of those 144 total yards. That means the other twelve combined drives netted 11 yards. ELEVEN YARDS. That alone should negate any moral victory Tech fans may have been desperately trying to cling to.
  • Now, on to the pooping: this offense is a long way from being able to consistently compete with the best of the best teams out there right now (OSU, Boise, Bama, Oklahoma just to name a few). I'm not sure if all the local talking heads were waterboarded with the Texas kool-aid or if they were just flat out lying when they went on and on about this new rushing attack. I'm guessing a bit of both. First off, let me say the offensive line really did a solid job of protecting young Gilbert so kudos there. However, opening up running lanes is another story. Of course, on the flip side, even when they did open up lanes, not sure our backs knew how or where to hit them. The primary issues I see: 1) Gilbert is a sophomore and although hugely talented with lots of potential, he's making some sophomore-looking decisions. Can't really bitch too much about this - he is what he is. I fully expect him to take some lumps this year, but to improve week in and week out nonetheless. But more importantly, 2) we have no playmakers who seem to want to (or are capable of) stepping up. Dropped passes, fumbled balls, weak running - I'm wondering when we're NOT going to see this. I know offenses always come together later than defenses, but we had better figure some things out because we've got a wicked stretch in our sights. I fully expect this offense to lose us a game or two this year - Nebraska looks like the prime opportunity, but they do get a bye the week before that one so that will help. Of course they get OU before that bye - and make no mistake folks, regardless of the Jekyll and Hyde look of the Sooners, they're good and they'll be ready to play.
  • Bryan Boyd has completely and utterly lost his mind thinking that Texas will just waltz through OU and Nebraska - neither are overrated and both are good. At least one will beat Texas. Etch it in stone and take it to the bank. If I'm wrong I'll be the happiest wrong guy in the world, but I don't think I will be.
  • Well, so much for that Jake Locker band wagon - damn thing broke down before I could even get on. Huskies way over hyped? Nebraska under estimated? I'm going with a little of both.
  • How about those Wildcats? What a game for Mike Stoops and that Arizona team - huge hurdle that had to feel good. But beware the let down Wildcats' fans - an angry and embarrassed Cal teams comes calling next week...
  • Is it me or do Notre Dame's losses not feel as bad this year with Chip Kelly as they did the last few years with Charlie Weiss? Can't explain it, but I think it's true. Odd given that they've lost two consecutive games (both to Michigan teams no less) by the hair of their chin. Gut wrenching, yes, but he's got them competing and you just feel like this team is closer than Weiss' teams ever were - even when they had Brady Quinn.
  • Would love to see that Texas defense go against that Oregon offense - I know they haven't played a ton of talent, but I don't care who you're playing, that offense is a well-oiled machine.
  • Heart breaker for Houston's Case Keenum - that kid was good and his loss the other night gave the mirage that UCLA is worth a damn.
  • Worse heart breaker? Houston's backup QB was also lost for the year....in the same game.
  • Does anyone have any idea at all what to think of LSU? Their offense ranks in the 90s nationally - which should make for some interesting conference match ups. Their next 3 games are against West Virginia (will be at a casino this weekend in Connecticut and dying to see the line here), Tennessee and Florida.
  • Ladies and gentlemen - your Texas A&M Aggies. That has to set confidence back a step or two for the Aggie faithful. Hey, at least you won, right? Saw the ticker scroll across the bottom and my jaw dropped. Really? Florida International? A week from this Thursday the Aggies get Okie State which should give Big 12 faithful a good idea of what to expect from both teams this year.
  • Lost in all the Denard Robinson hype (and there's a lot....rightfully so) is the fact that the Michigan defense damn near lost to UMASS......yeah, UMASS.
  • Mark your calendars for this Saturday when the Crimson Tide visit Arkansas - this is one of a couple of games that Bama could very well drop (and I'm still sticking to my pick that they lose one conference game this year). Could be a good money line bet....
  • West Virginia at LSU - don't worry Tiger fans, plenty of time to tense up with such a late start Saturday night.
  • Let's kick off some good NFL talk with a quick shout out to Braylon Edwards for getting popped with a DUI....on Tuesday morning.....blowing a .19.....at 5am. Two things: 1) aren't you an NFL player? What the hell are you doing drunk at 5am? 2) aren't you an NFL player? why don't you have a driver? And let me ask one more question here - why do people insist on getting their windows tinted so dark as to draw attention to themselves? He was pulled over because the tint on his car was too dark. Is that BS or can cops do that? When you got the tint, did you know you could have been pulled over and cited for it? When you got drunk and drove the car with the tint-too-dark, did you think you might get pulled over....you know....BECAUSE YOUR TINT IS TOO DARK??? Dumb people can be fun and they can be maddening - let's mark this one under maddening, shall we.
  • Alex Smith had a breakthrough, Frank Gore is a beast, Vernon Davis can run a route and Singletary can coach - now if only the Niners can stop turning the ball over....sloppy, but promising game for Niners. Saw a tiny, bright glimpse of Crabtree's potential with a great catch and double move last night. We need more of it....lots more of it....especially me since I've got him on my not-so-fantasy team.
  • Bears, Chiefs, Bucs, Texans - all 2-0. Cowboys and Vikings - 0-2. Won't stick, but who would have thunk it?
  • I know this has been said 1000 times over the past week and a half or so by the talking heads, but I agree - Favre simply looks tired and disinterested. The blind pursuit of Favre the last couple of months may prove to have an adverse affect on this team for the net 2-3 years to come.
  • This Houston Texans team is a different team. No way the Texans of the past two years would have won either of those first two games. When Kubiak chose to punt in overtime vs going for the 53-yard field goal I was very surprised, even thinking, "here we go again - same old Texans". Had they lost that would have been 100% on the Coach. But alas, great stand by the defense and great play by Schaub. Look out Dallas...
  • Speaking of Dallas - this could get very, very ugly folks. I don't want to sound over dramatic, but if Dallas loses to Houston (which I fully expect them to do), that could very well be the last straw in Big D. The NFC East looks wide open at this point, but Dallas looks like a team in shambles - from the coaching staff to every player...
  • With one exception - Miles Austin is a super star. Period.
  • If Jason Garrett gets another job in the NFL my head will explode. He's a complete and utter joke. Another stellar endorsement for Jerry Jones' eye for talent.
  • Poorly executed, but right move by Andy Reid to start Vick. Ride him till he bucks you (and he will). He's got the hot hand so keep feeding him.
  • I know folks are going to piss and moan about Vick and the attention he's getting, after all he did do some horrible things. But, didn't (and continues to) pay his debt to society? Does he not deserve to be reacquainted with normal life? And don't we WANT comeback stories like this more prevalent in society? We constantly hear stories and stats about recidivism in this country, isn't it kind of nice to see a comeback story? I'm just saying folks, let his redemption be bigger than his fall.
  • For those of you who didn't see this - my fantasy football team is so bad it prompted this comment from my wife (reigning champ of our league): "What's up with your team? Do you want me to draft for you next time?" Seriously, my team is Andre Johnson and a bunch of scrubs that look like Hill Country's Middle School teams from '89-'90.
  • The Bills are averaging like 80 yards passing a game. Good luck with all that Chan Gailey.
  • In case you haven't noticed, Jahvid Best is real, REAL good. Stupid good in fact.
  • I smell a 9-7 season for my G-men. It was almost criminal what the Colts did to them last week.
My Weekend Predictions...
Texas over UCLA by 20.
Alabama over Arkansas by 10 or less.
West Virginia over LSU by 6.
Texans over Cowboys by 10.
UPSET SPECIAL: Lions over Vikings by 2.
Game to Watch: Falcons vs. Saints on Sunday.

Non-Sports Thoughts for the Week
  • American Airlines is out of effing control with their upsells - next time you check in at a kiosk, pay attention. Want to upgrade to first class? $135 special for one leg. Want to get in group 1? $9. Want to purchase more miles? We have a couple of options. Want to check a bag? $25. Want to surf the web in flight? $14. All that and they're still such a poorly run business. I'm less and less enamored with American each time I fly with them.
  • I'm so behind on my shows I almost don't remember what's going on anymore - Rubicon and Mad Men....I miss you too.
  • My first ever re-tweet: came from the Sklar Brothers (who some of you may know as occasional guest hosts on the Jim Rome show...they're real funny): "Is it wrong that when I saw a pile of half-clothed barbie dolls in my daughter's room it reminded me of the train car filled with dead Russian hookers from the last episode of the Wire?" That's funny.
  • Not sure if you've heard about this, but Jon Stewart is planning a Rally to Restore Sanity to be held in Washington in late October. Sounds like a Glenn Becky-type stunt until I read on...as you may guess it's funny. Essentially he's "protesting" the fact that (likely) less than 20% of the population, led by those annoying, idiotic talking heads on cable TV, are responsible for the vast majority of hyperpartisanship that exists today - when in reality the vast majority of people are probably more than happy to accept a lot of the things we can't control OR, more importantly, happy to compromise and discuss the imperfect solutions that exist. Sounds good, right? Sure, but the funny part are the suggested slogans: "I disagree with you, but I'm pretty sure you're not Hitler", "9/11 was an outside job", "I'm not afraid of Muslims, Tea Parties, Socialists, Immigrants, Gun Owners or Gays...but I am afraid of spiders", "Take it down a notch for America". Funny, funny stuff.
  • In response, Stephen Colbert is planning his "Keep Fear Alive" rally. You can read more about it on Comedy Central's site, or here - http://www.cnn.com/2010/OPINION/09/22/avlon.jon.stewart.rally/index.html?hpt=T2
  • One more note on this - in a Time magazine online poll last year, Jon Stewart was voted "The Most Trusted News Man in America". Rrriiiiiiight. HE'S AN ENTERTAINER!!! I love Stewart, he's funny, witty and his common sense approach is quite refreshing. BUT, Dan Rather is a news man. Ted Koppel was a news man. Jon Stewart? He's an entertainer and a comedian. And a damn good one, but be careful folks....
  • Headed to Connecticut in the morning....ugh. Can't believe how inconsiderate Angela is being for having her wedding on the same day as the Bruins come to Austin to take one in the arse. Really? Connecticut? My Lord.
  • Do me a solid, will ya? Follow us on facebook: http://www.facebook.com/#!/carinositalian?ref=ts
  • California Tuesday, Back to Austin today, Connecticut tomorrow, Back to Austin Sunday, Oklahoma on Monday (oh sh*t, forgot to get my shots), Detroit on Tuesday, Back to Austin on Wednesday. Good times...